Einstein was no fool...

I decided to relax after dinner by reading something different.
I picked up a recent issue I had of Women's Day magazine (April 1, 2011)

I don't normally get this magazine. It's a replacement for a subscription I have to an interiors mag, which subsequently went out of print. I had not yet tossed this issue.
...maybe this is part of my problem....

Anyways, I came upon an article about organizing. The title: ‘No More clutter’ by Arianne Cohen.

'YAH RIGHT!' was the first thing that came to mind. Well actually that was the second thing that came to mind. What came first was the daydream of a completely white room with maybe a splash of color; tightly organized bookshelves, and end tables that were spotless. I dreamt a bit further to see not a spec of dust, paper or clutter on any surface...

THAT'S when I woke up,  'YAH- RIGHT!'

I have several books on this subject and have actually come a long way with the help I've received   from friends and loved ones who don’t like stuff- (they scare me).

But...I'm still always left with a problem.
Paper.

I have done the 'take pictures of artwork and memorabilia, then throw away the item'…It works.

I have created an art gallery in the hall for the kids ‘best’ art work, and I try to throw away things I don’t need. We have been giving away to Salvation Army, United Way, and neighbors for years. We resell books to the used bookstores, donate them to the library and to the kids’ schools. We don't really shop for 'stuff' so it's not like a have a surplus of extra things that I don't know what to do with.

But…there is still stuff!

So, I've been thinking that maybe, JUST maybe, it might be time to do that clutter clean thing again.

It wasn’t the article that made me want to tackle the clutter again, it was my own frustration!!

It infuriates me when I know that I have something but can’t find it.

Like many busy parents, home is the place where I show up, drop my belongings, tend to everyone and everything else and almost never organize anything.

I am forever in and out of the front door that I am too busy to sit-n-sort. At the end of the day, when I collapse… I'm checking over kids homework, reading, writing or on the phone.

And when I finally do set aside time to organize I get so caught up in the ‘every single thing I pick up’ deal;

And have to think about every piece and it tends to take too long, so I usually don’t do it until it is way over due and then I decide to pile it up and shove it in a cabinet…hence why I cannot find the paper I am looking for!

The living room was neat and clean and then.. I needed to find something! Grrrr.

I used to think it was just me who had a clutter problem….

But when there’s books on it, magazine articles covering it, T.V shows on it, organizing consultants selling their services, minimalists blogging about the ‘movement’ of less stuff…….

I know I am not alone.

THEREFORE,  I HAVE decided to TACKLE CLUTTER!!!

Not!

Einstein's Desk Was Full of Clutter! :) And He Was a Genius!!! 

...Maybe Tomorrow I will Tackle Clutter...
Because Today I Am Feeling Rather Smart!

HAPPY FRIDAY!  
Some Popular April Fools Jokes over the years:
http://www.aprilfools.com/
(Want to read which April Fools Jokes I fell for in the past,go to: http://www.FamilyMatterswithAmber.blogspot.com)

ENJOY YOUR APRIL FOOLS!

Truly,

Amber

The Story of the Blue Ribbon

Something I am quite passionate about is parenting and children’s rights. I have certain views on how children should be cared for and treated. Whether you are a parent or not, you can make a difference in a child’s life.

April is Child Abuse Prevention Month.

Please read about the Blue Ribbon Campaign. Visit the sites below and join in with me, while I support children everywhere, by raising awareness about child abuse and neglect. 

Not all abuse committed against children is physical, nor is it solely committed by a child's parents; so please educate yourself, and others, on the forms of child abuse and how it affects children.

The following was is from First5LA:

Starting in 1989, the Blue Ribbon Campaign, which serves as a physical reminder to end child abuse, began with one grandmother's personal commitment to end child abuse. By tying a blue ribbon to the antenna on her van, she "made people wonder." When members of her community asked about the significance of the ribbon, Bonnie Finney shared the tragic story of her grandson's death. Three-year-old Michael Wayne "Bubba" Dickenson was killed at the hands of his mother's violent boyfriend. Bonnie's loss inspired her crusade.
In her words, "We must protect our most precious gifts of all...our children. Please wear a blue ribbon...give one to your friends...tell them what it means...you may save a child's life!"

“The blue ribbon has become a national symbol for child abuse and a reminder of our need to protect our children. The Blue Ribbon Campaign happens each year in April, and the community is encouraged to wear a blue ribbon to symbolize a commitment to ending child abuse.”

Visit their site to learn more:

http://www.first5la.org/articles/national-child-abuse-prevention-month-history-of-the-blue-ribbon-campaign

Video-Concrete Angel:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=e2lZsmrFT4g

Just a small bit ofstats and information:
http://www.medicinenet.com/child_abuse/page4.htm#18whatdoes

Thank you.

Truly,

Amber

R.I.P. Elizabeth Taylor

A picture I took this summer of Elizabeth Taylor in a 1953 Whitman's Chocolate ad on display at the Chocolate Museum, Put-in-Bay, Ohio

From the time that I was a little girl I knew that Nanny (my grandmother) loved Elizabeth Taylor, because she always talked about her.

On the morning of Taylor’s death I called my Nanny right away so I could notify her. She was devastated, and I felt awful to being the bearer of bad news, but I just knew I had to let her know.

She said she was glad that I did.

I watched Elizabeth Taylor over the years. She had an open heart and accepting way towards people that many others might not have. My children watched her in National Velvet and loved her. I watched her earn awards, be an activist and shine her bright smile on everyone.

Nanny reminisced with me the things she remembered about Liz; her movies, her kind heart, her beautiful smile…but she never mentioned Elizabeth Taylor’s husbands.  

There was no gossiping - only honoring; respecting.

Sure, we could choose to pick her apart, condemn her for their mistakes and/or lifestyle, but why? People who are dying and who’ve died have something to say  and have many treasures they leave behind, such as lessons, experiences, memories, and organizations - a world of gifts that we should appreciate. Many who've passed have tried to leave the world a better place.

I’m the type of person who reads the obituaries. Call me past-my-time since I hear that only older people do this, I don’t know why that is, but I do it because I want to credit those who have passed on.  I want to admire those who’ve done it before me; who’ve done it better, who’ve lived harder, who’ve accomplished more; and I want to give them a moment of my time, even though I did not know them. 

Death is actually where we will all arrive at someday.  As morbid as it seems it’s true and it’s actually my inspiration.

One of my favorite books is ‘The Last Lecture’ by Randy Pausch and I’m presently reading ‘The Time of My Life’ by Patrick Swayze and Lisa Niemi (his wife).  Though both men have died since writing these books  they have something to say, some legacy to leave behind, and not just because they wrote a book; but because they lived. 

One of my favorite quotes and one that I use on my blog is:

Aspire to Inspire, Before you Expire - Author Unknown.

We aren’t given forever. We are only given 1 lifetime, and it goes by quickly. 

We have to make the most of it while we are still here. Things could change in a moment...

There are two quotes from Liz Taylor that I would like to share.

This one, during acceptance of the Humanitarian Award she said, “I call upon you to draw from the depths of your being – to prove that we are a human race, to prove that our love outweighs our need to hate, that our compassion is more compelling than our need to blame.”

This next one, upon her turning 50 years old:

‘I don’t entirely approve of some of the things I have done, or am, or have been. But I’m me. God knows, I’m me.’ 

Isn’t that when we’ve truly arrived? When we have become ourselves and more importantly, when we’ve become comfortable with ourselves?

To have gone to the grave knowing, forgiving and accepting herself.

I believe that this is when Elizabeth Taylor was truly at peace.

Please visit this site to see 10 Reasons Why Elizabeth Taylor Rocked:

http://holykaw.alltop.com/10-ways-elizabeth-taylor-rocked

CNN.News announces Elizabeth Taylor's death including past video interviews with her:
http://edition.cnn.com/2011/SHOWBIZ/03/23/obit.elizabeth.taylor/

 

When people say, 'She's got everything', I've got one answer - I haven't had tomorrow. - Elizabeth Taylor

 

Truly,

Amber

A Fun Friday Pawsitive Note!

Start Every Day With A Smile and Get it Over With. – W.C. Fields

Come on….you can do it! 

Truly,

Amber

 (Picture courtesy of Jodi)

D. I. V. O. R. C. E.: the dirty word

Divorce -Ew. Horrible…Ssshhh…

When I was getting divorced in 2005 it sure did seem like a dirty word.

And even though divorce seems more common than it was when I was growing up, it still has a stigma to it...

But, I'm not afraid to admit that, 'Yes, I am the D-word'.

I'm always amazed at how many people who are not divorced, or even married for that matter, can be so quick to judge.

How can they think they know what it's like?

I remember telling my family I was divorcing. It was my choice and not too many family members on either mine OR my ex’s side were thrilled.

I had one of my own relatives tell me, ‘suck it up, he’s your husband, deal with it’.  

Now that was interesting.

And then, how about when people say: ‘Divorce is soooo eeeaasssy….’ 

I can’t stand that. 

My response is, ‘No.  MARRIAGE is sooooo  eassssssy…’

There are very few hoops to jump through to get married.

Can you say J.P.? There are plenty of them.

Can you say quick? Some areas don't even require blood tests.

Can you say cheap? It can be, if you don’t have a full blown wedding.

(And don't even get me started on the financial incentives for a couple to wed.)

So if anything is easy, getting married is.

Envision that the nation’s 50% divorce rate could possibly reflect the following: 

If half of those people decided not to get married in the first place, divorce rates wouldn’t be so high.

There are many couples who should not be together, should not be getting married, or should not still be married. (A conversation for another day.)

The fact of the matter is, there are more hoops to jump through to get a divorce than there are to get married. 

 And divorce carries the most excruciating, emotional and financial baggage you will ever experience.

Divorcing after 11 years, with three children under the age of eight, with a newly built home and a ton of debt…HARD

Saying goodbye to who you were, life as you knew it and the future had planned for your family…HARD

Splitting the time you spend with your children on holidays, weekends and at bedtime...TRAUMATIC

There is nothing about divorce that is easy...

Everyone is entitled to their opinions and I can respect that.

But how do you kindly explain that there were no other options. How do you prove that you tried everything before you singlehandedly pulled the plug on your family’s routines, and dreams?

You don’t.

And the good part is that you don’t have to.

We all make choices in this life. Whether others agree with us, or not, should not be our main concern.

People are human; they are going to make mistakes. And when they do, they ought to be afforded the freedom to fix them.

And like marriage, divorce is a choice that can be made in America, by almost anyone, almost anywhere, and is not likely going away anytime soon.

So if you have never been divorced, and presume divorced people have taken the easy route, think again. 

It’s not nearly as easy as you imagine.

If you are married and are considering divorce make sure you’re sure. 

Because this is the path you are about to choose, and none of it is simple.

But if it’s the only way out for you, than no one should fault you for it. 

Just know this: don’t try to do it alone, find support.

Be strong, stand tall, things will get better…

Ask me how I know…

Truly,

Amber

Previous author/columnist for ‘Life Goes On’, which was about my new life as a single, divorced mother of 3.

DON'T FOLLOW ME...

DON’T FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER, FACEBOOK OR MY BLOG.

I DON’T WANT YOU TO Follow me… instead, I’D LIKE YOU TO go with me. 

I’m a blogger on a mission to lighten people’s days.

I’m not selling anything except contemplation and smiles.

I’m not an expert on anything, just experienced in my own existence. 

Once single, once married, once divorced; three children, working hard and persevering.

Life does have its doozies, and I seem to end up with many of them, but somehow on most days I still end up happier than I was the day before, so I figure, why not share...

If you know someone who would benefit from reading my blogs, please share me!

I hope to reach as many people as I can so thank you in advance for sharing me and my goal.

Please forward my blog link to someone today!

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                                             Thank you!

 Truly,

Amber

‘You can make your world so much larger simply by acknowledging everyone else’s.’

                                                                          – Jeanne Marie Laskas

                                                       Columnist

Swing into Spring

My little man...last year...practicing his Swing

The first day of Spring is Sunday, March 20^th, and golfers everywhere will be celebrating!

For the upcoming occasion I have collected some quotes I found from golf movies.

Enjoy!  

 

Truly,

Amber

 

Bringing Up Baby (1938)

“My dear young lady, I'm not losing my temper. I'm merely trying to play some golf.”

– David Huxley (Cary Grant) 

Caddyshack (1980)

 [Judge Smails is taking an inordinately long time to hit his drive on the first tee, while Al Czervik waits in the next foursome]
Al Czervik: While we're young.

Happy Gilmore (1996)

Bob Barker: I can't believe you're a professional golfer. I think you should be working at the snack bar.

Bob Barker: This guy sucks.

Happy Gilmore : That guy is driving me crazy.   

Bob Barker: You know what’s driving me crazy? You not getting the ball into the hole.

Tin Cup (1996)

Roy McAvoy: When was the last time you took a risk?
Dr. Molly Griswold: Well, I'm with you, Roy. I'm with you.

 Legend of Bagger Vance( 2000)

“There's a perfect shot out there tryin' to find each and every one of us... All we got to do is get ourselves out of its way, to let it choose us... Can't see that flag as some dragon you got to slay... You got to look with soft eyes... See the place where the tides and the seasons and the turnin' of the Earth, all come together... where everything that is, becomes one... You got to seek that place with your soul"  

FU on Grace

Today was not a very graceful day…maybe it has something to do with the chocolate….

Anyway, I swore, (and I’ve vowed to stop that) I yelled out loud in my car at another driver on the road and I pouted at the end of the day.

I’ve been struggling a little bit with My One Word…and that is why I’ve decided to do a little FU on Grace…

Follow up, that is.

I’m not perfect, heck, that’s why I’m using Grace  as My One Word this year; to help me practice being Graceful in all aspects of my life….

HA!!!!

If I had picked kindness, compassion, or charity, there’d be no problem…

Or, if I chose humbleness, strength, or maybe humor, I’d say again, NO problem,  ‘I got this’…. 

But, if I had, it’d be too easy.

So, I picked Grace

…Ugh…

I picked Grace because I felt that I needed reminding sometimes. I needed a cue to force me to display patience when I didn’t want to, and give forgiveness when I should but can’t. 

It sounded like a great idea!

I really don’t do long lists of New Year’s Resolutions anymore and I thought choosing a word to live by for 12 months would be fun!

Yeah, no, it’s hard.

I definitely don’t want to discourage anyone from doing it. I just advise you be prepared.

‘This ain’t no picnic Boo Boo.’

It’s biting your tongue, holding your breath, counting to ten, and sometimes just walking away.

It’s seeing someone for good, rather than bad. Viewing things from other people’s perspectives. It’s taking time to reel yourself in and think about what you do and why you do it.

The good thing about My One Word is I never feel discouraged so much that I want to quit it. Since this type of resolution is one that is just between me (well.. and now you..) and myself. I know that if I get it wrong today, I will learn something from it and then get back on track tomorrow with practicing Grace.

If you’d like to try doing what I am doing, visit this site, it is one of my favorites and it’s where I got this idea.

My One Word:

http://myoneword.org/choose/

On this site you can do an exercise or two. You can also read some inspirational stories and take a few minutes to gain insight into yourself, who you want to be and where you want to go. 

Or… you could just get frustrated trying to live by One Word …LIKE ME!!

If you visit the site or choose your own One Word, please come back and share with me what you thought and/or what One Word you chose.

Tomorrow is another day….

Hopefully it will be GRACEFUL.

 

Truly

Amber