Friend or Un-Friend

On Facebook, as in real-life, it is sometimes necessary to Un-Friend someone.

It happens. Occasionally, a friend who you thought you knew turns out to be someone you didn’t expect them to be.

In life it’s a bit harder to Un-Friend someone, but my question is: Why do people do it?

I guess there are probably times when you Friended them, or they Friended you and it was too soon in the relationship to be Friends…

Now that you feel like you know them better, you don’t like really like them anymore. Or maybe it’s an ex-boyfriend, (which I found out today you are supposed to Un-friend immediately-oops). 

I am sure there are tons of reasons for Un-friending somebody but I wonder if it happens because some people are concerned with having as many friends as possible, regardless of who they are or if they share similar interests and beliefs. 

Then they end up with Friends they don’t really know or even like...

(Correct me if I am wrong, if I say you are my ‘Friend’ doesn’t that mean that I have to at least like you?)

Anyways…..

I’m left to assume they must be striving for Friend quantity rather than Friend quality.

Maybe it’s about some people choosing to act differently when you first start talking to them.

You meet someone new, or it’s someone you knew in the past and are meeting them again; the conversation seems nice, they seem nice but then you talk a few more times after that and the more you get to know them they seem to change…

You eventually wonder who this person is. 

Usually, it’s not them changing, it’s the Real Them….it just took them a while to come out.

If that happens, no worries, FB makes it as easy to Un-Friend them, as it was to Friend them.

Just go to your Friends list, click edit friends and all of your ‘friends’ will be laid out in front of you (who are all completely unaware of what you are about to do- by the way)

Then, by clicking the little blue X next to their name you officially ‘remove’ them as your Friend

Now - they no longer exist.

Well, that is not entirely true. They do exist, just not in your FB World.

Honestly, I’d have to say that my  #1 reason to Un-Friend someone on FB (yes, I have done this) is because they do not sensor what they post and are either too crude or too judgmental and I don’t think that my friends and family would appreciate the lack of respect.

My wall is not for them to post their insulting or cruel thoughts. (Yes, Freedom of Speech, I get it, but really? It's just not neccessary.)

So, if you all of a sudden are no longer my Friend on FB -I guess you'll know why;)

*To all of my True Friends: 

I am blessed to know you and I know you are genuine and I respect you for being yourself. I appreciate you! (And sorry for any icky stuff you had to endure on my wall written by disrespectful Friends – that sounds like an oxy-moron..)

**A note to my future-potential-Un-Friends: If you Un-friend me or plan on Un-friending me in the near future, I would like to say thank you! 

I would rather you be honest and Un-friend me than pretend to Friend (like) me.

 

Truly,

Amber

Everyone Loves a Good Video

Fear is a state of mind.-Napoleon Hill

Watch this video and feel inspired:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=w30ZlGiZRIo&feature=related

If you’re not conquering self, you will be conquered by self.-Napoleon Hill

 Truly,

Amber

 

Cat vs. Internet - A MUST SEE!!

 

     Fun Friday

Happens to the Best of Us

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/253wzW/theoatmeal.com/comics/cat_vs_internet

Truly,

Amber

Are You a Text Message Abuser?

‘Hey Pot, this is Kettle….’

‘Are you a text message abuser?’

‘Yes,yes I am....'

'That is why I can write this post.’

I’ve been that person; opting to text before calling someone, because it seems quicker or easier. Most times I’ve chosen to relay important messages via technology rather than speaking them. (But get upset when others do the same..)

I have also been the one who’s not fully available during a face to face conversation, distracted by that untimely incoming message (because for some reason I haven’t figured out  yet that my text-message inbox has a built-in-readable-mailbox so I don’t have to answer every text immediately). And of course being disgusted that someone else has done it to moi.

Like computers, texting has become, I think, a-cool-new-fang-dangled-gadget that was supposedly going to make our lives easier (and can sometimes) but that that we end up abusing. 

Texting, more often than not can actually interfere with relationships and communication, not always enhance them.

You know what I’m talking about…

How many times have you texted someone, only for the message to: 

A) never reach the person

B) reach them too late 

C) come across wrong and you had to write 20 more texts to clarify what you ‘really meant’ only to end up on the phone for about an hour with that person anyhow because…‘texting’ just wasn’t working?

I’m beginning to realize that once a person depends on texting as an acceptable way of corresponding, they falsely consider it a sustainable replacement for good old fashioned communication.

Trust me... I understand all too well that it takes time to make a phone call. Because unlike when you’re texting-you cannot always multitask, nor can you stop talking at any moment and pick up the conversation later. 

(Hence me being the Kettle.)

Texting is not the same as speaking and can actually do more damage than good.

I've learned this the hard way.

For instance, some people do not text or do not care for it and they do it with you because it's the only way you will respond...(sound familiar?-yes, I recognize this too). These friends/relatives do not value texting, they don't prefer to do it, but yet we do not use their preferred source of communique and so when we choose not to call them they may feel that they are not important to us. (Seems a little one-sided doesn't it?) 

-Again, I understand, since I am the Kettle.

And to defend my texting practices and all those out there who live ridiculously busy lives (which is almost everyone) texting seems the right thing to do most of the time but read on....it isn't always.

When we’re texting there can be moments of bonding opportunities lost.

For example:

Humans have five sense and hearing is one of them. When it comes to human bonding, nothing enhances a conversation like the sound of someone’s voice. 

Especially when saying 'I'm sorry..', 'I love you.', or 'How can I help?'. 

Also:

Listening is an art which benefits both the person who is speaking and the one who is listening. Texting does not clearly prove that someone is listening, nor can the person who’s talking always feel acknowledged and understood if they cannot see the person on the other end. (Body language has been said to account for 93% of a conversation.)

I can say all of this, because I am guilty of it.

So since the New Year, I have tried to be more aware of this and make a phone call over texting if the situation allows, and I try to notch out quiet time to make that call so that I can be present 100% (which does take preparation sometimes but is worth it).

When I get off the phone with the person I chose to call rather than text, I never regret it. I feel very fulfilled. I am content that we understood one another, and above all, bonded. 

Because that is what relationships are all about.

Do you think texting is the quickest, most efficient way to communicate or the quickest, most efficient way to destroy a relationship?

Tell me your pros and cons on texting.

**And I have a challenge for you**

This week, when picking up the phone to text a message, ask yourself this question: 

Would it be better if I called?

Truly,

Amber

Numbers a Coincidence?

I don’t know much about numerology, but I do have this thing with numbers.  

I find it fascinating sometimes how things completely work out with the same series of numbers adding up or showing up.

Makes we wonder if it’s fate or coincidence? 

I have never found the time to look up numerology, so if after reading this blog, if you have some fantastic insight for me regarding this type of stuff, I would love for you to enlighten me!

I began noticing number connections when I was 13 and I will share with you my string of numbers.

My lucky/favorite numbers are 3, 7, and 13.

At 13, my dad moved us to a new town. Our new house # ? 13.

I have three children. I planned on having more, but my ‘X’ said no. I landed on 3 forever because we were divorced.

My lucky day has always been Friday the 13^th; never any bad luck, not superstitious. My first day of custody trial began on Friday the 13^th! And we won!


When I was a teen my telephone # was it's prefix-then it's prefix with a 2 at the end.
My phone # now, you wouldn't believe me if I told you it's part of my address with my lucky number and the # of members in my family .

Speaking of my address, yes, it has the #13 in it....
 

Two out of three of my children were born on a day that ended with the same number as the year they were born in:

--/-7/1997

--/-1/2001 

My last child was supposed to be born on a similar date: --/-4/04 

This would've been my son’s birthday. He was planned for a c-section on this day but on a pre-op visit they noticed that the O.R. over-scheduled and so he would arrive a week early…so close.

I was divorced one year to the day from when I asked for the divorce. I approached my spouse in June 2005…

Exactly twelve months later, and at the 11^th hour (court time) my divorce was finalized.. 

The # of the day ended the same as the year did- --/-6/06. 

My daughter and my fiancé share a date: her birthday and his wedding with his first wife.

My other daughter and my fiancé have birthdays that are 1 day apart.

His mother, my grandmother and my ex-husband all share birthdays.

And something that I never thought about it until today-not too sure why-but I realized my birth year has 2 of my lucky numbers in it.

And my last weird-number-thing for now is kind of eerie but comical:

Last night we watched the movie Number 23 and in it the main character was reading a book that mimicked his life (or so he thought). 23 was the # that made him mad (as in crazy).

While I sit down to write this I had to look back at one particular post to see how long ago it was published online, what do I see? 

It was published on the 23^rd.

Then I think, what day is it today????

AH! The 23^rd!

YIKES! Weird or just a coincidence?

Ah, who knows?

I won't be losing any sleep over it though.

And about the movie: it was okay; actually a little bizzar'o.
But if you like Jim Carrey, he’s in it. Check out thisYouTube Link-short trailer-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XkQIjcjyBbA&NR=1

(In the movie Jim Carrey does his best to contain his Jim-Carrey-isms…but they still leak out from time to time.

What’s YOUR #? And where does it keep showing up?

Truly,

Amber

Good Girls

It's Good Friday but it's also Fun Friday.

I'm good but there is a part of me who likes to have fun.

In my world I enjoy my faith more than you probably know.

But, I enjoy other things as well.

Today is Good Friday-and not all people are interested in Faith and Religion, and that is not for me to say.

I respect all individuals no matter their preferences.

As much as I feel strong about my faith- I love and accept those who do not.

So for today's Fun-Good-Friday Post I would like to share one of my favorite quotes:

“Well-behaved women rarely make history.”

 Laurel Thatcher Ulrich quotes

Hence; don't keep your silence because others expect you to. 

Stand up, ask questions, don't be afraid to speak up...and be yourself.

Truly,

Amber