Are You a Text Message Abuser?

‘Hey Pot, this is Kettle….’

‘Are you a text message abuser?’

‘Yes,yes I am....'

'That is why I can write this post.’

I’ve been that person; opting to text before calling someone, because it seems quicker or easier. Most times I’ve chosen to relay important messages via technology rather than speaking them. (But get upset when others do the same..)

I have also been the one who’s not fully available during a face to face conversation, distracted by that untimely incoming message (because for some reason I haven’t figured out  yet that my text-message inbox has a built-in-readable-mailbox so I don’t have to answer every text immediately). And of course being disgusted that someone else has done it to moi.

Like computers, texting has become, I think, a-cool-new-fang-dangled-gadget that was supposedly going to make our lives easier (and can sometimes) but that that we end up abusing. 

Texting, more often than not can actually interfere with relationships and communication, not always enhance them.

You know what I’m talking about…

How many times have you texted someone, only for the message to: 

A) never reach the person

B) reach them too late 

C) come across wrong and you had to write 20 more texts to clarify what you ‘really meant’ only to end up on the phone for about an hour with that person anyhow because…‘texting’ just wasn’t working?

I’m beginning to realize that once a person depends on texting as an acceptable way of corresponding, they falsely consider it a sustainable replacement for good old fashioned communication.

Trust me... I understand all too well that it takes time to make a phone call. Because unlike when you’re texting-you cannot always multitask, nor can you stop talking at any moment and pick up the conversation later. 

(Hence me being the Kettle.)

Texting is not the same as speaking and can actually do more damage than good.

I've learned this the hard way.

For instance, some people do not text or do not care for it and they do it with you because it's the only way you will respond...(sound familiar?-yes, I recognize this too). These friends/relatives do not value texting, they don't prefer to do it, but yet we do not use their preferred source of communique and so when we choose not to call them they may feel that they are not important to us. (Seems a little one-sided doesn't it?) 

-Again, I understand, since I am the Kettle.

And to defend my texting practices and all those out there who live ridiculously busy lives (which is almost everyone) texting seems the right thing to do most of the time but read on....it isn't always.

When we’re texting there can be moments of bonding opportunities lost.

For example:

Humans have five sense and hearing is one of them. When it comes to human bonding, nothing enhances a conversation like the sound of someone’s voice. 

Especially when saying 'I'm sorry..', 'I love you.', or 'How can I help?'. 

Also:

Listening is an art which benefits both the person who is speaking and the one who is listening. Texting does not clearly prove that someone is listening, nor can the person who’s talking always feel acknowledged and understood if they cannot see the person on the other end. (Body language has been said to account for 93% of a conversation.)

I can say all of this, because I am guilty of it.

So since the New Year, I have tried to be more aware of this and make a phone call over texting if the situation allows, and I try to notch out quiet time to make that call so that I can be present 100% (which does take preparation sometimes but is worth it).

When I get off the phone with the person I chose to call rather than text, I never regret it. I feel very fulfilled. I am content that we understood one another, and above all, bonded. 

Because that is what relationships are all about.

Do you think texting is the quickest, most efficient way to communicate or the quickest, most efficient way to destroy a relationship?

Tell me your pros and cons on texting.

**And I have a challenge for you**

This week, when picking up the phone to text a message, ask yourself this question: 

Would it be better if I called?

Truly,

Amber

Numbers a Coincidence?

I don’t know much about numerology, but I do have this thing with numbers.  

I find it fascinating sometimes how things completely work out with the same series of numbers adding up or showing up.

Makes we wonder if it’s fate or coincidence? 

I have never found the time to look up numerology, so if after reading this blog, if you have some fantastic insight for me regarding this type of stuff, I would love for you to enlighten me!

I began noticing number connections when I was 13 and I will share with you my string of numbers.

My lucky/favorite numbers are 3, 7, and 13.

At 13, my dad moved us to a new town. Our new house # ? 13.

I have three children. I planned on having more, but my ‘X’ said no. I landed on 3 forever because we were divorced.

My lucky day has always been Friday the 13^th; never any bad luck, not superstitious. My first day of custody trial began on Friday the 13^th! And we won!


When I was a teen my telephone # was it's prefix-then it's prefix with a 2 at the end.
My phone # now, you wouldn't believe me if I told you it's part of my address with my lucky number and the # of members in my family .

Speaking of my address, yes, it has the #13 in it....
 

Two out of three of my children were born on a day that ended with the same number as the year they were born in:

--/-7/1997

--/-1/2001 

My last child was supposed to be born on a similar date: --/-4/04 

This would've been my son’s birthday. He was planned for a c-section on this day but on a pre-op visit they noticed that the O.R. over-scheduled and so he would arrive a week early…so close.

I was divorced one year to the day from when I asked for the divorce. I approached my spouse in June 2005…

Exactly twelve months later, and at the 11^th hour (court time) my divorce was finalized.. 

The # of the day ended the same as the year did- --/-6/06. 

My daughter and my fiancé share a date: her birthday and his wedding with his first wife.

My other daughter and my fiancé have birthdays that are 1 day apart.

His mother, my grandmother and my ex-husband all share birthdays.

And something that I never thought about it until today-not too sure why-but I realized my birth year has 2 of my lucky numbers in it.

And my last weird-number-thing for now is kind of eerie but comical:

Last night we watched the movie Number 23 and in it the main character was reading a book that mimicked his life (or so he thought). 23 was the # that made him mad (as in crazy).

While I sit down to write this I had to look back at one particular post to see how long ago it was published online, what do I see? 

It was published on the 23^rd.

Then I think, what day is it today????

AH! The 23^rd!

YIKES! Weird or just a coincidence?

Ah, who knows?

I won't be losing any sleep over it though.

And about the movie: it was okay; actually a little bizzar'o.
But if you like Jim Carrey, he’s in it. Check out thisYouTube Link-short trailer-
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XkQIjcjyBbA&NR=1

(In the movie Jim Carrey does his best to contain his Jim-Carrey-isms…but they still leak out from time to time.

What’s YOUR #? And where does it keep showing up?

Truly,

Amber

Good Girls

It's Good Friday but it's also Fun Friday.

I'm good but there is a part of me who likes to have fun.

In my world I enjoy my faith more than you probably know.

But, I enjoy other things as well.

Today is Good Friday-and not all people are interested in Faith and Religion, and that is not for me to say.

I respect all individuals no matter their preferences.

As much as I feel strong about my faith- I love and accept those who do not.

So for today's Fun-Good-Friday Post I would like to share one of my favorite quotes:

“Well-behaved women rarely make history.”

 Laurel Thatcher Ulrich quotes

Hence; don't keep your silence because others expect you to. 

Stand up, ask questions, don't be afraid to speak up...and be yourself.

Truly,

Amber

Clutter Cleaning Adventure Complete!

I am proud to announce that my recent Clutter Cleaning Adventure was successful! 

It’s been two whole weeks since I decided to start tacking clutter again and began talking with a professional, making a plan, and setting aside time to do it.

I started with the living room since it’s the common area (and also the worst affected room). 

In the beginning this project seemed way too daunting, but with a little help and some dedicated time, it wasn’t so bad.

It’s been a week and we are still clutter free! (If you know me, you know this is a big feat.)

I’m actually enjoying this more than I thought I would! (I’ve involved the kids too, and their rooms look quite nice, if I might say so myself.)

I had mentioned in an earlier post, about a woman named Karen, who’s a professional clutter and organizing specialist.

She helped me see things through her eyes and below is a few other tips that she shared with me.

I thought they made complete sense and wanted to share them with you.

Top 3 Reasons to Hire Help :

1)  You hire a professional workout coach...so why not a professional organizer. If you need someone to motivate you to work out...what's wrong with hiring someone to motivate you to get organized?
2) Organization is not your strong point. By hiring a professional organizer such as a NAPO member (National Association of Professional Organizers) or an ICD member (Institute of Challenging Disorganization - works with Chronically Disorganized & Hoarding).... you are hiring a professional that can meet your specific needs.
3) You hire a professional to show you how to organize your space (or life) in the most efficient manner to make the best use of your space.

 

5 things you can do on a daily basis to avoid getting into the clutter-trap again:

1)  Do a little each day....  15 -20 minutes each day
2) Never leave a room without taking something out of it (and putting it back where it belongs)
3) If it doesn't fit....get rid of it
4) Don't buy things because they are on sale...only buy it if you REALLY need it. Also, if you don't have the space for it...don't buy 20 of one item
5) Have a place for everything...or get rid of it  

Here are two things I’ve realized myself-If I want to stay clutter-free:

1)      Use the touch-it-once strategy; put everything in its place and address items as soon as they are brought to your attention so as not to have a heaping pile of ‘procrastination’.

2)      Have good time management; leaving extra time to tackle the problems of paper clutter, to-do-lists and filing.

I hope you were inspired to join me in clutter cleaning an area of your home or office, and I am very optimistic about your success.

Please share with me what area(s) you chose and what one thing you learned.

Additionally, please visit Rowdy Kitten's blog I follow. Her guest blogger wrote about how to deal with sentimental items.

http://rowdykittens.com/2011/03/sentimental-items/

From my clutter-free living room to yours,

Truly,
Amber

To contact Karen Fried:

Karin E. Fried, CPC
Organizational Consulting Services
www.organizationalconsultingservices.com

www.professionalorganizer4u.blogspot.com
kefconsulting@gmail.com
(440) 666 - 9326

Member of:

National Association of Professional Organizers (NAPO) &  National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization (NSGCD)
Certificate of Study in Chronic Disorganization
Certificate of Study in Basic Hoarding Issues With the CD Client
Certificate of Study in Understanding the Needs of the Elderly CD Client
Certificate of Study in Basic ADD Issues with the CD Client

Certificate of Study in CD Client Administration
CD Specialist - Level II Certificate
NAPO, Quantum Leap Trainer
NAPO in the Schools Trained Provider

ITS ALL ABOUT Y.O.U.

Blogs are everywhere.

If you go to blogger and keep clicking the ‘next blog’ button you will find all types of blogs written by a variety of different people.

They are written in different languages, by different ages and genders regarding just about any subject. 

You can learn about food, hobbies, illnesses, your neighbors families events and more, by reading people's blogs.

Traditionally, these blogs are about the those who are writing them, or at least about something that involves them.

Blogs seem to be a way for people to be able to ‘tell’ someone about themselves. 

Kind of like Facebook, though with more space to write and with better graphics options.

It’s a neat concept and I love blogging. 

I just wonder where I fall into blogging because every time I write a post, I feel like it’s more about you-than it is about me.

Sure, I write them, and I do tend to share some personal information, but I do this for the reader.

My goal is to keep the ‘self’ to a minimum and the 'you' to a maximum.

I love interacting with people and I love getting to know them. 

I would very much like to get to know Y.O.U.

Write me a note about yourself; tell me your story, tell me what your dreams and aspirations are or what inspires you to be the best You! Tell me something that you would like to get better at. Tell me what has helped you most in your Journey through Life.

One of my favorite things to do is listen to others.

Send me a note about Y.O.U. to:  AmberInspiration@gmail.com 

(Or maybe you have a blog of your own and would like to share your link. Please do! I would love to read it!)

 

Truly,

Amber

Not Necessary, But Worth The $$

I generally do not spend extra money on things that don’t seem practical or logical.

I think that I was brought up this way. 

My parents were not millionaires and they taught me to be wise and careful with my money. 

Then being a single mother for several years taught me a few things about spending and conserving.

But with that being said, I still find there are a few little things which are definitely worth the money and should be purchased if the desire is there and if you have the money, because just like dieting or discipline- we shouldn't completely go without a little treat now and again...

My favorite things are:


Ice cream


Fresh flowers 

Take-out Pizza

Morning Coffee

My favorite lotion

Egg nog in the winter

Scented Candles (My favorites, and when I buy them, the only ones I buy are Partylite)

A new CD (Mine usually comes in the form of a Christmas CD/once a year at Christmas)

This list of items might seem very random to you, and granted not one of them is a necessity.

That’s what makes them so special.   

Each one has a little convenience or comfort rating in my life and I have realized over time that I don’t want to give any of them up, if I can help it.

There are times when there is absolutely no room in our budget for extras, and therefore I cannot have everything I would like...but if I can manage one thing off this list every so often, it’s a treat and adds a little more joy to my life.

What are some of the little comforts you won’t give up?

Is it a dish in your kitchen that’s always full of your favorite candy? 
Is it a special coffee you look forward to every morning? 
Is it a membership to somewhere that you refuse to give up? 
Is it your weekly news paper or monthly magazine subscription?

What to you is clearly not necessary, but that you will not part with because if anything, it makes life easier, or just plain makes you smile?

Don't deprive yourself of it... 

...Life is too short...enjoy it.

Truly,

Amber



Cats Do Taxes Too

Although taxes aren't due until Monday, you still hould have already mailed them already.
   (Like you really need this reminder...)

 If you owe, I thought you could use a laugh.

  This is hysterical.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q7UVNH73eBY&feature=fvwrel

The cat makes out pretty good with hers...

Truly,

Amber

MOTIVATIONAL MAGAZINE Contest!

If you've been visiting Yellow Inspiration it's obvious you value motivation and personal growth.

It's also apparent that you appreciate those little positive morsels each day which help inspire you to keep going.

So do I! 

There‘s a mini-book that I like to read. It's called Bits & Pieces and it’s full of motivational quotes and inspiring stories.

If you love a positive tidbit now and again to help...

·         Remind you to keep your chin up

·         Remind you to stop and smell the roses

·         Remind you that it isn’t as bad as it seems

·         Inspire you to ‘go for your dreams’

…You should be reading this!

 I first started reading Bits & Pieces in 1998.

And each time I read something from it, it made my day!!

This publication is available in small monthly paperbacks. 

 And.....

  

 I love it so much I'm running a contest so I can share it with YOU!

Starting April 13, 2011 and going until May 12, 2011, the reader with the most comments on Yellow Inspiration WINS A FULL 12 month subscription to the Bits & Pieces Magazine!

Contest Rules:

You cannot be a member of my family (for obvious reasons)

Comments must be made between 12:00 am, April 13th and 11:59 pm on May 12th.

The winner will get their own twelve month subscription to Bits & Pieces Magazine mailed to them monthly!

The winner will be posted on Yellow Inspiration

Friday, May 13^th!

Happy Commenting and Good Luck!

'Don't let anything keep you from struggling and seeking to be a decent, striving human being. It is where you are headed not where you are from that will determine where you end up.' 

  - Marian Wright Edelman (Founder of the Children's Defense Fund)

                        (A quote in an issue of Bits & Pieces Magazine)

Truly,

Amber

FU on Clutter Cleaning (Don't worry-this went better than Grace)

Take Two of 'Let’s Tackle Clutter'

 

I DID IT!!! 

I set aside time this weekend to tackle my living room!!!

The kids can sit on the couch again, my fiancee can find the ottoman, and I can write without moving ten million things beforehand! 

        
      Phfew!

Here is the before picture of a section of my writing area:

Here is the after:

What did it take exactly?

A free Saturday morning, a garbage bag and some storage bins...

...and the courage to throw papers away! (See, I told you this Follow Up would be better than Grace;)

What 1 thing did YOU do this week to clutter clean?

Did you attack the junk drawer? The linen closet? The trunk of your car maybe? 

I know! Maybe you decided to clean out the pantry or your Tupperware cabinet!!!! 

NO? -You didn’t do any clutter cleaning or purging this week?????????

Well, warm weather is coming; Spring Cleaning Season has arrived! 

Do it now, before you spend all your time outside!!!
 

"Less is more." - Ludwig Mies van der Rohe (architect)

Truly,

Amber

What Reality T.V. Does To Books...

A MUST SEE IF YOU WATCH REALITY T.V.!

http://www.stumbleupon.com/su/6x4YgI/www.ratemyfunnypictures.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/A-Book-Commits-Suicide...-640x553.jpg

 Truly,

Amber

Created by Party Favors

Surnames After The Wedding

So he wants me to take his name. 

I will be his wife, so should I blame him? 

I guess I don't but as an independent woman I feel frustrated having to explain myself about not being eager to give up my own surname. 

I love him and  will be completely honored to be his wife, as I would be honored to take his name; that isn’t really the question.

The question is: Do I want it Ala carte? Or do I prefer to hyphenate?

He has a very nice name: Davis.

I  have a very nice name as well: Chapman.

Maybe it’s a man thing. Maybe they feel insulted if you say no.

Or maybe it’s a woman thing; we don’t want to lose our independence and identity.

I took my first husband’s name, and frankly, I did not want to.

At 22, when we were newly engaged, I told him so.

He wasn’t thrilled, and I received some big rant about women's-lib-this-and-women’s-lib-that, followed by some swear words.

I took his name.

And I always regretted it.

I didn’t regret it because I thought the name wasn’t lovely: Gluck. (It’s not really lovely.)

But, I actually regretted it because even after I knew how I felt and said how I felt, I went ahead and changed my name anyways.

Tell me it was because I was young…and not because back then I was a pushover. I certainly didn’t start out as one.

I'd like to think that I did it out of respect. But now looking back, what about some respect for me? And for what I wanted?

I suppose that wasn't important to either of us...

Fast forward 11 years later; I was divorced, with a last name I never wanted, and decided to hang on to it for the kids’ sake. Then finally- I had to shake it….

And so now here I go again, down the aisle of matrimony, and naturally I’m faced with the same question: 

To take his name or not? And if I do, in what form do I do it?

I think Davis is a lovely name.

And no doubt, Amber Davis sounds lovely as well.

Though Amber Chapman is who I am; it’s who I’ve been. It’s who I’ve become.

There are so many different opinions on this name-change business.

This is my second marriage; I changed my name against my own discretion for my first husband, and now my second husband would like me to take his name.

Should I go a la carte or a combination of the two? 

Tell me what you think...

Truly,

Amber 
(Chapman, Davis, or Chapman-Davis?)

I will always write by the name Amber J. Chapman- at least he understands that part;)

Let's Clutter Clean Today!

Let’s tackle clutter today!

I know that I’ve said this before…. but I mean it this time.  

Last time I was just thinking about it. 

You know… seeing if I liked the way ‘clutter cleaning’ rolled off my tongue…

I didn’t like it… so I decided not to do it. It became my April Fool’s joke instead.

Buuuutt….I have to admit that although I have done clutter cleaning over the years (I have! HONEST!), I think I may be out of the habit of identifying clutter and could stand to use a little refresher.

I recently talked to Karin E. Fried, CPC Organizational Consultant and maybe you can relate:

She said the Top 3 reasons for a person to clutter clean and work on changing clutter-keeping habits are:

1) Clutter causes stress... you don't want to invite people over because you are embarrassed with how your house looks...  so you cut yourself off from people
2) Clutter costs you money... you buy things that you already have...because you can't find them or don't know that you have them
3) Clutter costs you time... you are late for work or school because you can't find your car keys, report,  briefcase/book bag....

Hmmmm………

While I am not always 1, 2 and 3 at the same time, nor am I any of these 100%, I can say that there’s been occasions where #3 happens a lot more often than I’d like to admit…and maybe once in a while my mess does sometimes seem to hurl me into a frenzy of ‘tidying up’ before someone arrives at my home for a visit…

She also said that the Top 3 things that most people need assistance with are:

1) PAPER Management  ,,,,  the most sought after reasons to hire an organizer
2) TIME Management
3) Space Management

Okay, so maybe I do need a little help.

But where do I begin???  Clutter cleaning seems like such a daunting task.

Many clutter books say that the kitchen is the most troublesome spot.

I do not agree.

So, I asked Karin.

She suggests doing these three things first:

1)  Make a goal list and keep it short. Do not come up with a huge game plan. You are only setting yourself up to fail.
2)  Pick one room or one project.
3)  Break that room/project down into even smaller projects....  that way you will do them and feel like you accomplished something...therefore you will continue with the rest of your plan

 

I get it! Instead of declaring that I’m going to clutter clean the whole house!!  Which sounds great!!

I will pick one room at a time; identifying the problem areas that I’d like to see changed, then tackle them one at a time, i.e.; junk drawer, kitchen counter, shelf over the sink or living room bookcase and cabinet.

Then of course there is the time factor: Scheduling some!!! LOL!  Because otherwise, I know it will never get done.

I will use this motto that I heard a couple years ago:

IF IT’S NOT USEFUL, BEAUTIFUL OR JOYFUL, GET RID OF IT!

(I have a feeling I might also need to use My One Word: Grace…)

Wish me luck & maybe you will join me on my adventure!?
My 1st Room: Living Room 

Happy De-Cluttering!!!

Truly,

Amber
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Here is Karin’s latest Blogs about why people don’t ask for help with their clutter cleaning and of all things – Clutter in Gardening!

http://www.professionalorganizer4u.blogspot.com/

Read on CNN.com: Why we have clutter:

http://articles.cnn.com/2009-01-20/living/rs.top.causes.of.clutter_1_clothes-obstacle-attic?_s=PM:LIVING

Here is a link to some questions you can ask yourself about your clutter:

http://www.unclutter-organize-transform.com/is-this-you.html

Here is a link to a minimalist blog that I follow (Tammy shares closet cleaning tips in this post):

http://rowdykittens.com/2009/12/5-simple-closet-cleaning-tips/

To Contact Karin E. Fried, CPC Organizational Consulting Services:

www.organizationalconsultingservices.com

www.professionalorganizer4u.blogspot.com

kefconsulting@gmail.com

(440) 666 - 9326

Member: National Association of Professional Organizers (NAPO) and National Study Group on Chronic Disorganization (NSGCD)
Certificates of Study in Chronic Disorganization, Basic Hoarding Issues With the CD Client, Understanding the Needs of the Elderly CD Client, Basic ADD Issues with the CD Client, CD Client Administration, CD Specialist - Level II Certificate
NAPO, Quantum Leap Trainer
NAPO in the Schools Trained Provider